FORK IN THE ROAD

There comes a time in everyones life, a turning point – a change in thought, a fork in the road – where we drastically change our thoughts, modify our behaviours, start doing things, though many times stop doing things as well. For the last fifteen or so years I have been a self-identifying gay/bisexual man (lets not get too hung up on sexual identity labels!)

Up until very recently I was in a steady, long-term, same-sex relationship. After a good twelve-or-more months of deep thought, prayer and reflection, I had an adult conversation with my partner and we called it quits in January 2016: on the feast of the Epiphany to be exact... one could almost say, "I had an epiphany ON THE Epiphany!" Was an amicable break-up; we are still good friends: praise the Lord!

So I've lost the need to identify with a specific sexuality finding much more freedom within myself as a result. A strange time to choose to leave the gay-lifestyle at a time in history when things are drastically changing in many western nations, people becoming more accepting of gay/lesbian folk, many now forcing it upon the rest of society.

I'd like to thank several different people and sources for my change in thinking, namely the Australian Catholic Bishops Conference with their "Don't Mess With Marriage" booklet distributed nationwide in Catholic schools last year. But most of all I'd like to thank God, for without the Holy Spirit many things would have fallen on deaf ears.

Not all my research and information came from religious or "anti-gay" sources as the media portrays. A fair amount came from a well educated, feminist lesbian, Camille Paglia; in other words, I made a good effort at getting factual information, scientific information, theological information from both left and right, none could call me a bigot just because I now believe what's not the current social-norm, politically correct thing to do.

Here in Australia we have an upcoming plebiscite on the "gay marriage" issue. Thanks to God and the outpouring of the Holy Spirit I have drastically changed my mind on where I stand on the issue. I could no longer live my life, comfortable within myself, with such conflicting issues regarding my faith and sexuality, particularly when I read about the controversial "Safe Schools Coalition" already in many high-schools nationwide, teaching students unhealthy behaviours such as breast-binding and how to tuck-away your penis, and the ability for boys to go to school in dresses and vice-versa.

I've recently seen documentaries of young boys, not even into their double-figures in age, choosing to be "transgender" well before they have the mental capacity to fully understand their choices, and today I read how next month they will be teaching toddlers about sex and cross dressing in preschools, kindergartens and childcare centres!

Clearly even here in Australia the gay-lobby has gained too much power, and must be stopped. I don't want to fight for the rights of adults to live "on par" with traditional marriage. I'd much rather fight for the traditional understanding, as well as for those who are unable to fight for themselves just yet: the children of Australia, many of whom are growing up in broken homes already, without fathers etc;.

Children much be able to live their lives as children, not pushing them into the world of sexual ideologies too soon. They will have plenty of time to deal with those things when they become legal adults, unless the world finally sees through the lies of the gay agenda and yet again make drastic changes back to the way things were last century.

Perhaps if I was never exposed to the gay world at such a young age myself, who knows, but my life could have been very, very different by the time I turned 30. Maybe have a wife, my own family. A house, job, car and licence.

Instead, I must pick myself up yet again, dust myself off and see the positives to have come from the darkness in my life.

GAY+CATHOLIC =OXYMORON

Sacked CDF priest Krzysztof Charamsa and his partner, Eduardo.
SOURCE: Washington Post

Only a couple of months ago, on the eve of the synod on the family a Vatican priest came out of the closet as gay. He has a partner and believes it is time for change within the Church when it comes to LGBT Catholics. Consequently he worked in the 'Congregation of the Doctrine of Faith' (CDF) trying to bring about change from within the walls of the Vatican. In other words, he infiltrated the Church for his own personal, selfish reasons and that of other ignorant so-called gay Catholics.

Now, I say so-called gay Catholics, because to be gay is a self-imposed label. Innocently enough it starts, I for one classed myself as a gay Catholic only a couple of years ago; I have since seen through the lies: the education of the secular world, modernism, the lie that we are 'born this way' – lies; ALL LIES!!!

In my honest opinion to call yourself gay and Catholic is a complete oxymoron as the ideals of the two world are very conflicting. My point in case is that the priest I wrote of was calling for a change to teachings, more acceptance of gay and lesbian couples – basically that the Vatican should be condoning the sin of acting-out ones same-sex-attractions. The biggest issue I have here is that a) this priest should not be 'sleeping with' anyone regardless of sex. b) He took vows as all priests take of chastity, but ignored that commitment he took with God.

How can the Church say that those who feel they are exclusively same-sex-attracted are able to act on those inclinations outside the Sacrament of Marriage? Just because you're 'gay' doesn't give you any special privilege to live against the teachings of the Church while those with normal sexual attractions to the opposite sex must wait to be formed into one-flesh with marriage before they can have relations of a sexual kind. As this priest says, the Church uses 'Nazi words' against gays and that 'the Church needs a Stonewall,' referring to the New York riots of 1969, a pre-cursor to the gay rights movement in America.

After coming-out he has been sacked by the CDF, the Pontifical Universities he once lectured at and has lost his privilege to say Mass – unless he realise his HUGE error in judgement, particularly using the Synod as a tool at his disposal to cause maximum damage control, and he repents. Many would be saying that this is a grave injustice, homophobia in fact, though that is also quite reflective of the gay community and their activists, trying to shame everyone throughout the western world to accept their conditions, or condone their sins.

How can someone identify as gay, Catholic and also be a consecrated priest living in a same-sex relationship? They cannot! He knew what he was getting himself into; now he has turned his back on God in favour of the gay agenda. You can't possibly have an individual who takes religious vows of CHASTITY, perhaps one of OBEDIENCE TO SUPERIORS and treat them like they mean nothing. I am pretty darn sure they mean something to God. Becoming a priest isn't a step that is to be taken lightly. It is one that needs much prayer, study as well. You are giving yourself entirely to God – you are no longer your own person, but a person that is to be Christ-like: a servant for the Church of Christ.

Those most vulnerable to the self-imposed exile of being gay need education. They need to know what is true, what is false – specifically when it comes to gender ideology and being 'born gay.' If I had been told the truth from a younger age that sexuality does not define us as people, that I shouldn't decide on a sexuality at all – we are all children of God – perhaps my same-sex attractions wouldn't be as ingrained within me, they most likely would have simply been a phase of a young, developing, hormonally charged teen.

If I had of known back then what I know now, things would have turned out quite different indeed. Perhaps I have struggled with same-sex attraction only to at last 'see the light' so I can someway, somehow, use what I've learnt to educate others for Christ. Jesus does love gay people like he loves us all, but he does not condone the acting out of these attractions, or of any sexual encounters before marriage. We all have our own cross to bear, for some people that cross is to suffer from same-sex attraction. Pray for wisdom, discernment, patience, perseverance and perhaps one day those attractions will subside substantially or be entirely removed. 'All things are possible with God!' Matthew 19:26.

My 'coming-out' story

So it's late at night. Can't sleep. Been a while since I've blogged. So get ready for one of my little all-over-the-place somewhat mini-rant and 'coming out' story. For those expecting a juicy, steamy, sexy adult post, you've got another thing coming! I'm coming-out of the closet with a range of thoughts, reflections and more importantly: as a creature of God, with a very Catholic view on the realm of sexuality, and the world in general. Enjoy my rant, feel free to comment!

Like any good practicing Catholic, I read the Bible every day. I reflect on it, I study and pray it too. Over the last few years I have been working my way through a guide so you can read the entire Bible and Catechism over the period of one-year, ticking the days off as you go. I am yet to actually fully complete one of these booklets, which I printed it from the internet, twice! Whether I actually complete the booklet, ticking off each day – or whether I start again if I have been inactive for a long period of time – isn't the point of the exercise. Rather starting one's healthy relationship with scripture is! Perhaps I'll print it a third time and start again in 2016, only this time I'll read the Catechism column as well. Previously I have only read the Bible column of the guide.

At the moment I am reading through 1Kings, also known as 1Samuel. As we Catholics aren't all that into memorising scripture, for those not well acquainted with scripture 1Kings is about King Saul, David and Goliath leading to the anointing and Kingship of David. The last time I remember reading these chapters I was referred to them by a pro-gay-Bible article I read only a couple of years ago. My thoughts have changed significantly since then as I was pro-gay-marriage more-so out of lack of education on the matter, not because I wanted to get 'married' myself.

So, as I was reading last time I was actually reading my personal thoughts into the Bible. The relationship that David had with King Saul's son, Jonathan, was symbolic of a gay relationship, what with them kissing and all. This is from reading a very Catholic Bible, the Douay-Rheims! It doesn't have to be a corrupted translation of scripture. At the end of the day there are really only two types of Bible readers: a) Those who read for the TRUTH allowing SCRIPTURE to CHANGE them; b) Those who read SCRIPTURE with their hearts closed to the TRUTH, finding any possible way of CONDONING their SIN regardless of how stupid and irrational it sounds to anyone else.

Besides, the whole idea of sexual preference and defining it is only a fairly new ideal of modernism. Before the latter part of the last millennium no one anywhere actively defined themselves based on who they find sexually attractive. Many people who did have same-sex relations were fooling around, or depending on the culture it was a thing of power, domination, at times even for pagan religious worship. This all led me to reflect on my life and experiences. Certain things were filling my head from the past and the present as I lay in bed trying to sleep.


Mind racing, I decided to get up for a while figuring I wouldn't be getting to sleep any time soon, the hot night not helping much either. Back when I was in high school I remember people mentally placing people into groups. The jocks, the popular girls etc; and one of the new though un-popular fashions was to be 'label-free' which most people hated because we had the high school opinion that we must define, re-define, over-define pretty much everything in life.

Aware of having an attraction to the same-sex I would define myself as bisexual, then as gay, back to straight again followed by gay. Back in the turn of the century growing up I was picked on for this choice for the rest of my days at that school. Why didn't I just go by 'label-free' if I was having trouble choosing my sexual identity, as if it ever matters, especially at the age of thirteen! Like I said, it wasn't cool to be 'label-free' because then you are just wanting more attention. Rather stupid way of thinking, because now I would much rather use that term than gay, bisexual or straight. For someone to call themselves 'label-free' would be much smarter and not looking for or wanting attention.

In hind-sight I wish I made much better decisions in my early life, one of those being not to define myself by my sexual thoughts because it just doesn't matter! Sometimes I believe if I had kept it to myself I probably wouldn't have ever ended up going through the gay world. It could have been that decision to tell someone who blurted it out, making me hated by my peers for the rest of my time at the school. As a result I looked for friends outside of school, my hormones running wild and never really having any close male friends through my earlier years. Thus the gay community became a home of sorts at a very young age. Now it is a culture I can see through, one I have known about, one I have no interest in anymore.

Why would I want to support the lies of the gay community? Everyone looks so happy, so gay in the original meaning of the word, why not hijack the word to define their disordered affections? Not happy with that they even make a mockery of the rainbow. Truth of the matter is it is just a facade all the carefree happiness they exude. On the inside, they're crying. They're miserable. Depressed. Whether it's from a combination of drug and alcohol abuse or just their deep need for real love not objectification, the gay community really has nothing to offer anyone. Not that I am saying those in the community are worthless, but they are duped; by the media, secular education and their disordered way of life.

Many are seemingly ignorant, useful cogs in an agenda they don't know actually exists. There is much truth in the popular saying: 'ignorance is bliss!' I on the other hand would prefer the truth, even if it is hard to accept and apply to ones life, because as an ever better saying goes: 'the truth will set you free!' John 8:32.